Parents just don't understand.....

More and more each day I am learning I have four very different children. Each with their own soul and passion, each with a unique personality and will to do what they know to be the adventure of life.

Sometimes they are happy and some days they are sad some moments are filled with creativity and some with frustration, many moments in a house of six are filled with work and many with fun and imagination.

I find myself so many times as a mom embracing the moments that are filled with positive behaviors and enjoying the uniqueness of each of my children. The moments when Hali wants to do nothing but read. The moments when Meccia paints freely and creates what I believe to be a masterpiece, or when my boys Carson and Easton play pirates and sail the ship (laundry basket) around the house.

But how do we handle the moments when our children are being themselves in ways that are hard for us as parents to deal with?

When they are sleepy at four in the afternoon and its not a great time for a nap but not quite bedtime. Do we expect them to just suck it up and behave even though that is not how they are feeling at that moment, or do we just lean in to that emotion with love and be understanding with some of the behavior we wouldn't normally except, because we know it is because they are tired.
Or like when you have a strong willed child one who doesn't want to be told what to do...Do you demand they follow your every command or do you embrace that strong willed child and instead give them a few choices all of which are acceptable options and allow them to make the decision.

I am discovering every day how much I as a parent need to stop trying to turn my children into something they just simply are not. I think all to often as parents we want our children to grow up and be doctors when they may in all actuality want to grow up to be a airplane pilot or an artist or even hold your breath a stay at home mommy!

We want our three year olds to act as if they are ten...We expect perfection from inperfect children...How would you feel if people put those same expectations on you...Maybe they already do..Maybe you are stressed and feel useless and incompetent. Maybe you are longing to be your true self but feel as though you will be met with confrontation and a lack of understanding from those around you.

Is this what we are doing to our children? Maybe some of us without even realizing it?

I pray that I am a parent who shows my children support one who embraces who they are as individuals never expecting them to be or act like anything but themselves. I hope that I am a parent who shows unconditional love and one my children can count on to stnad behind them through any struggle they might face.